just

channel your energy into something productive

they tell me

you’re talented, but you need to be motivated

they say

write everyday, exercise your mind

they give advice

that no one asked them to give

i write for me

it brings out the anxieties i keep hidden

and stains the perfectly clean paper with my dirty thoughts

of love lust loss life and misery

my unclean mind can fill a page

but my unrest eases as i attack my typewriter

viciously trying to put down thoughts

as they come

because they will  go

and scrape out a piece of my heart when they leave

they choke the life out of my eagerness for life

a girl can only be beaten so many times

before she locks herself in her room

and tries not to give in to these thoughts that stick

themselves to under the cold side of my pillow

in between the pages of my favourite books

to my toothbrush or deodorant

they leave their mark on anything ordinary and make it painful and intrusive

just leave me alone and take my thoughts with you

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s